|Cast: Steven Pasquale,
Director(s): Brothers Strause
Well, what can you say? It will be what it will be.
I, for one, was truly disappointed with their first encounter, but the obvious cliffhanger leading to this film looked promising (and was actually what I wanted to see the first timne around).
Again, this will be judged (by me) on how much it is ruined by the presence of humans. There are no real 'stars' attached, which is good I think.
I could make this a trip to Ottawa for a saturday afternoon PLONT/Manos thingy......
...though I'm sure I'd have no problem getting Deril to catch it here in TO.....
It'll suck. It'll suck big-time! Just you watch!
If you don't go to Ottawa for this, my arm need not be twisted....anything to get me away from all the nagging andscreaming...um..of a family of love...(Sha na na na)
PRECISELY: It'll suck!
Suck like a dime-store dry-dock hooker at low tide!
Who's keen? You drivin'?? I'd drive to T.O. for this puppy!
Well Mikey, time to put your money where your mouth is! Are you PLONT enough to drive to Toronto, and come see a matinee of this with Deril and I, ON CHRISTMAS DAY?? Family and festivities be damned??
Only TAIIME will tell!
(this can be followed up with an awesome round of AVP chess!)
Oh, you KNOW I'd be so there...SOOOO THERRRE!!!
But, in the grand scheme of things: Family trumps F'ing KEWLE B-Plont Movie Schlock....
(What Would Hudson Hicks Ripley & Vasquez Do?)
THEY'D FACKING SCREAM:
(Derek: WE NEED FONT CONTROLS!!)
"It's game over man!"
Best. Christmas. Ever!
Well, a very entertaining romp, MUCH better than the first one. This is essentially a summer blockbuster, but in december.
The good news is that no one is spared - an immense bloody gory body count which includes kids and pregnant women and hospital patients and presumably an entire maternity ward (!), so if you're sensitive to the plight of helpless people and children (Mikey) you may wanna pass.
The action is standard - by this point we've seen pretty much all that these two franchises can offer - but abundant, and there are actually a few nifty gross-out scenes that had Deril and I kinda squirming. Of course, there's nothing here really scary, more thrills than chills.
The bad news - and this is really annoying - is that about 95% of the film is in the dark/rain/sewers/night/blackouts.....there is almost NO light, making it very hard to make out some of the action and monsters. By now, we all know what the predators and aliens look like and there's been ample previous screen time to establish them in a realistic visual sense, so why make the whole film muddy and murky? A big let-down on that front.
Otherwise, wall-to-wall action.
Also, there was a brief scene of a predator on his home planet, and the end was left open for another sequel (of course), so my fingers are crossed for an Aliens Vs. Predators...IN SPACE!
We shall see.
Oh, and don't expect much in the way of dialogue.
And I quote:
"People are dying! We need more guns!"
again, MItch has pretty much said it all, so not much more to add.
Was that the.........?
Is that the predator...or the Alien, or both? NEITHER??!
Why did she suddenly become a CARBON copy of Ripley...? AND in a tank-transport? Is that the cigarette smoking man??!
I'M SO CONFUSED!!!!!
What a mess. 95% of the time I had NO idea what was going on, the movie ripped off (not riffed from - RIPPED OFF) from the very movies that inspired it.
OH! And kids and babies get killed. Nice.
OH! And the hawte girl strips down to her bra and panties and that's IT!!?!?!
Yet you jizz all over Cloverfield.....
"Fucktard" - LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh COME ON...
All they were missing was a TOUGH Latino character called "Vasquella" and a whiney, panicky tech-dude named "Hoodsun" and the carbon copy rip-off would be complete.
I mean, make up something MORE original...they had a GOOD thing going with the Hybrid...exercise some imagination!! Don't re-hash old character types and simply use almost every scene from the Original Films (ex: the Predator sticking a healing-pin in his wound and howling, the skinning alive and stringing up of his prey (WHY would he do this??!)...it was like they combed through all four of the Aliens movies and both Predators, took loose notes and barfed it out into a small Colorado-town setting.
On the topic of the Hyrbid, was I mistaken or did it have all the Predator's targeting system and stealth technology??!! WHY?!??!!?!
When the face-hugger fused genes with the predator host, it was doing so on it's ORGANIC components (the 4-tooth face, the rasta hair, etc) and its ARMOUR would have NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!!!
Hey - I'm all FOR dumbness in movies, but it has to be INTELLIGENT dumbness...i.e. don't TRY to appear "smart" if you're making a B-Movie creature feature...
Mikey "Connaisseur of Schlock" McBoing-Boing
"B-Movie creature feature"...that about sums it up!
I enjoyed it on that level. What more can I say?
You want logic?
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